Splendour In The Ass

We all woke in the dark at 5am to catch our flight. While waiting for the this flight to board... Holiday ate a hash brown, Pia and I ate 2 and Josh ate a Subway. We arrived at Gold Coast feeling pretty shit. It was only 8:30AM and I was in Queensland. I was not happy. Things got momentarily better when we realised our manager Neil had booked a 8 seater van! Not a piss-ant midget car! We wouldn't have to hold our instruments on our laps for an hour! But things went for the worst 5 mins into this luxurious van ride... Someone who I may not mention FORGOT the fucking Splendour Pass for our too-hot-too-touch van, our sound guy t-dogs and a pass for herself. I didn't say anything at the time but my head nearly exploded from the stress this caused.

We ''rocked up'' to the festival.. usually you feel really cool driving past all the motherfucker punters waiting in line and staring at your artist van. Well we rocked up at splendour at 9:30. No one was even fucking there. I swear they were still setting up our stage. There was no food even! Pia felt this the most. She is the hungriest person I've ever met. I think she was actually shaking when she realised there wasn't even a weiner to eat. I will tip my hat to splendour though- they got new passes for us within an hour! Supposedly they had to laminate them by hand??... It was 1pm - Holiday and I were about to do our JTV and Fastlouder interviews.... Pia had found food (an american hamburger to be exact for 6 dollars, she said it was shit), Millie was still trying to get her ''boyfriend'' into the festival, Josh was wasted, Holiday just found out her cough medicine could potentially have a laxative effect and I was pissed off cause I had mud on my shoes and was still trying to find the GRASS at "Splendour in the GRASS". We played our 45 min set. I don't really want to type or think about it. I'm still confused. I'm as confused as everyone is about flaming lips coming out of a vagina on stage. For the rest of the 2 hrs at Splendour we were graced with the usual Backstage goers that shouldnt ever be let backstage but think they are really cool for being backstage. Millie yelled at Pia and then said sorry. Josh hid the alcohol because ''a fairy'' was stealing it. I still haven't pin-pointed what mental issue he has yet. I dont know what Holiday did actually. I think she was talking on the phone. That sounds about right. I was walking around aimlessly wondering why everyone was wearing Raybans. We left Millie and Josh behind. They decided the festival would be the better option. Fair enough. Holiday, Pia, T-dogs and I drove back to the airport in the van. Got a crispy chicken burger and boarded the plane back to Sydney, Pia was still hungry...

(Written By Daisy)